Drunk People

Matty P likes drunk people. Most of them at least. I have created categories for drunk people, but I would appreciate any additions I've forgotten.
Reluctant then not so reluctnat drinkers: I love getting girls to drink - not necesasarily getting them drunk, but with a lot of girls, drinking will eventually lead to getting drunk because most girls I know are hella light-weight. Really though, getting a girl that doesn't want to drink to drink ts the most challenging and rewarding thing to do when you are drinking, especially when you consider that the next most challenging and rewarding thing is making it to the bathroom to take a piss. And before you all think I'm a complete jerk that loves getting chicks drunk so I can have sex with them, let me assure you that I have never ever had sex with a drunk chick. I don't roll that way. Seriously. But let me reiterate, there is nothing funner than seeing a girl who half an hour before was swearing that she wasn't going to take even one shot and that she really really didn't want to get drunk again suddenly getting drunker than you. That's just a very rewarding feeling and it makes me all happy inside - when I'm drunk.
Angry drunks: I don't like these people so much. These are the guys / girls that take a couple drinks and then suddenly think they are the shit and that everyone else should think so to and that if you don't think so.... blah-blah-blah slap... that was the sound of me bitch slapping them with a stool and then moving on to my favorite category.....
Stupid Drunks: These are people - usually girls - that will tell you anything.... anything in the world if you ask right. I was told by one girl that if my brothers girl-friend was there, she would smash her head into the counter. That would make a lot mroe sense if this girl had been an Angry Drunk (see above category) but she wasn't. She said it with a smile. And that means that she was jsut being honest. And that's a little scary but at the same time entertaing because it showed a side of her that she didn't want anyone to see. I have also been told by complete drunken strangers that they I was really really cute and that when they first saw me they though I was really really cute and that's just plain funny because you know a girl's drunk when she says that about me! I have been told that I have magic-soft hands and that she wondered what were the many wonderous and marvelous deeds I could perform with such hands (another complete stranger). And that's just more good, clean family fun.
Immobile Drunks: And then of course, lastly, we have the classic immobile drunk. These types are always a source of entertainment: they just can't move around like God made them to. Instead they revert to the pitiful method of transportation: crawling. Yes, you've all seen it: grown men and women crawling across the floor, sometimes like babies on their knees, sometimes like parapelegics on their stomachs, dragging themselves with their arms and making annoying grunting noises like a hamster getting it from behind. Of course if you have my luck, you end up with Clingy-Immobile-Chick who decides crawling is too much work and you are her bitch taxi for the ngiht and you end up carrying her dumb-ass around when you would much rather be laughing with everyone else at the Stupid Drunk (see category above).